TL;DR:
RTO is bringing business and client dinners back and they’re becoming increasingly important. Learn why these moments are important and what you can do to stand out in a good way.
Return to office pushes didn’t just bring back desks, commutes, and calendar chaos. It brought back something many people forgot – or never learned in the first place: client dinners.
I’m not talking about the casual kind, where you’re chatting with a client. I’m talking about the white-tablecloth, professional, “everything-you-do-is-being-noticed” kind.
If you’ve been virtual for most (or all) of your career, this isn’t your fault. A whole generation of professionals missed the slow, subtle education that used to happen simply by being around offices, clients, and business meals. But here’s the reality: these moments are back, and they still matter.
Because business dinners aren’t about food. They’re about focus, respect, and credibility. And yes — everything speaks .
Why Client Dinners (Still) Matter
It’s tempting to think business dinners are outdated or performative. They’re not. They’re compressed communication environments, where people learn how you listen, prioritize, manage yourself, and how aware you are of others in two hours or less.
At a table, there’s nowhere to hide.
Unlike meetings, dinners remove the guardrails. There’s no agenda, slides or mute button, which is exactly why they’re revealing. People aren’t judging you for knowing which fork to use – they’re watching how you move through a shared experience.
Do you notice others? Do you stay present?Do you understand the purpose of being there?
In an RTO world, these moments are becoming trust accelerators again and trust sill is and will always be the currency of business.
Hosting Is Leadership (Even If You’re Not “The Boss”)
The first thing to clarify before any business dinner is simple: who’s the host?
If it’s you or your organization, you’re leading – whether or not you hold the biggest title at the table.
Hosting starts before anyone sits down. It means arriving early, checking in with the restaurant, and making sure the experience is smooth for your guests. It also means choosing seats intentionally, not randomly. Your client gets the best view, the least distraction, and the most comfort. You take the worst seat – because that’s what leadership looks like in practice.
These decisions aren’t about control. They’re about care.
When you handle logistics quietly, confidently, and ahead of time, everyone else can focus on the conversation. And that’s the whole point of the dinner in the first place.
Presence at the Table Is the Point
Let’s talk about phones, because this is where things start to fall apart.
Your phone does not belong on the table. Not face down. Not on silent. Not “just in case.” Once your guest arrives, it goes away with your notifications off – including your watch! Your attention is on the people in front of you.
Why? Because nothing says “you’re not my priority” faster than a glowing rectangle between you and another human being.
If you truly must check your phone, excuse yourself and step away. Do it cleanly and quickly and don’t check messages on the way from the the table. Trust me – people notice.
Presence also shows up in pacing. Business dinners (no matter how much you don’t want to be there) are not races. Eat slowly. Wait until everyone is served. If your plate is the first one down, wait. Pro tip: Never go into a business dinner hungry – eat a snack beforehand so your hunger doesn’t hijack the meal.
The goal isn’t to finish your food. It’s to build connection and accomplish the purpose of the dinner.
Table Manners Are Communication
Table manners is often when people roll their eyes – but manners aren’t about being “fancy.“ They’re about being predictable and respectful in a shared space.
Here are a few of the basics to know:
- Put your napkin in your lap: It signals readiness and awareness. Use it to dab, not as a tissue. When you leave the table, place it neatly by your plate.
- Chew with your mouth closed: Nobody wants to see you chewing your food! Ever.
- Start eating together: Always wait until everyone’s plates have been put down, no matter how hungry you are (see snack above). This signals respect for your fellow guests.
- No grooming at the table: Don’t apply lipstick, touch-up your hair, or pick at your teeth. Excuse yourself from the table and take care of any grooming needs in the bathroom.
Alcohol deserves special attention and can be a slippery slope. If you drink, cap it at two – and for many people, one is smarter. Drink water or a N/A beverage throughout the meal. Nothing erodes credibility faster than getting tipsy in a professional setting!
These behaviors aren’t about rules – they’re about reducing friction. When you remove distractions and discomfort, conversation flows more easily. And that is the point.
For a more detailed look into etiquette, check out Emily Post’s guide here.
RTO Isn’t About Nostalgia – It’s About Readiness
Client dinners aren’t going away. If anything, they’re becoming more meaningful as in-person time becomes more intentional.
You don’t need to be stiff or perform. You just need to show up with purpose, presence, and respect for the people across the table.
Because when everything speaks, your behavior (and body language) speaks first – and at a business dinner, its’ doing most of the talking.
Listen to Lee’s podcast on the subject here!